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First date red flags

Опубликовано: Июн 14th, 2009

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red-flagMost single men will stop at nothing, to wow the pants off you, during your first date, which includes lying thru their teeth. At other times, fibs are used to sidestep less than desirable situations. And though it would be impossible to convey all the untruths uttered by guys, what follows are a few of the more common ones.

DATING LIE #1: «I’m between jobs.»

Don’t let a lie like this get lost in translation. When a dude feeds you this one, what he’s really trying to say is, «I have no clue what I want to do with my life.» A man says, «A few years ago I was collecting unemployment and crashing on friends couches.» He says, «I had zero direction, but it wasn’t like I could confess that to a girl without her thinking I was a total loser. Saying I was between jobs was the best way to sugarcoat my situation.»

WARNING: This guy’s mom still does his laundry, and there’s a good chance you will get stuck with the dinner bill.

Don’t assume he’ll work things out, because when he does, you may realize his ambitions don’t mesh with yours. This mistake has contributed to the starter-marriage phenomenon, in which couples in their 20’s and 30’s, suddenly realize they’re going in different directions, and divorce at an early age. It’s preventable as long as you’re both clear about your plans.

DATING LIE #2: «I never move this fast on the first date.»

Truth be told, he can’t believe you’re letting him move that fast. It’s the woman who dictates how far things go. «I’m always up for action, but I’ll play the prude card just so my date doesn’t think I’m a player. «Bottom line: If you give a guy an opportunity, he’s going to take it.

DATING LIE #3 «I’ve never had a serious girlfriend.»

Sure, it’s possible he’s never had a bona fide relationship, but chances are there’s an ulterior motive here. It could be a sly way of saying he can’t commit. On the bright side, he might be trying to pique your interest with a covert challenge.

Don’t you want to be the one girl a guy can’t resist falling for?

DATING LIE #4 «I’ll call you.»

This may sting a little, as it’s very close to home. The last time I said I’ll call you, to a girl, was after I’d had the worst date of my life. I felt obligated to say something, just to be polite, but I «lost» her number the second I walked out the door.

But there is some good news. There’s a sneaky way to tell if he’s a dubious dialer. A specific «I’ll call tomorrow after work,» or «I’ll call you Friday,» almost guarantees he’ll make good, on the promise.

Dr. Carl Leonard

(Read this article in Russian here)

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